Pirates of the Caribbean Murder Mystery
by FNB Capt. Matt McFly
Summary: Summary inside. Next death is up!
1. Prologue

The Pirates of the Caribbean Murder Mystery  
  
First off, let me say this is a homage to The PPG Ski Lodge Murder Mystery, which I am proud to say I am a character in. However, to fit the title, there will be a few changes.  
  
1. No authors can be one of the lodgers. However, you can have a cameo at the end. Just say so if you wanna.  
  
2. You can still guess who the killer is, but I will not end the story if you guess right. However, if you get it, you'll receive a $10,000 prize package. (Okay, maybe not, but let's say that you did.) Also, I have a Death List of the characters who die in a certain order. So, no voting off a person.  
  
Here is the basic outline:  
  
Elizabeth and Will invite 4 other PoTC characters, 2 Indiana Jones characters, 2 teens, and the Teletubbies to a vacation at a Ski Lodge in Northern New Jersey. However, things go quickly awry, as there is a killer amongst them. Whodunit? Only I know...  
  
And the "lucky" lodgers are:  
  
PoTC: Jack, Will, Elizabeth, Gov. Swann, Norrington, and Barbossa  
  
Indy: Indiana Jones and Henry Jones  
  
Teens: Matt Dalton and Dana Burton (my two fankids)  
  
Teletubbies: Tinky Winky, Dipsy, Lala, and Po  
  
Murders will only take place in the Kitchen, the Bathrooms, the Bedrooms, the Hallway, and the Library  
  
Now, here's three hints. One, the Teletubbies are NOT the killers because they are idiotic morons. Two, the murderer is the least likely person. Three, Matt is sadistic. Okay, the last one is a fact, but important.  
  
This story is a combination of horror and comedy. This story has also been rated R by me for strong violence and gore, strong pervasive language, brief drug use, and some sexuality.  
  
Now, on with the show!  
  
It was a cold January day in northern New Jersey. In a bus, Will Turner was driving 13 other people to a ski lodge he and his wife, Elizabeth, had rented for the next 4 weeks. (Lucky bastard...).  
  
Elizabeth was utterly perky, explaining the fun things to do while they were there to Gov. Swann, her father, and Barbossa, the resurrected rival of Capt. Jack Sparrow. Barbossa rolled his eyes, but the Governor listened intently to his beautiful daughter. (Damn that Turner-I MEAN...)  
  
Meanwhile, at the back of the bus, Matt Dalton and his girlfriend Dana Burton were watching Little Shop of Horrors for the umpteenth time during the long drive. Matt had a sour look on his face. Suddenly, Capt. Jack popped up from behind him, scaring him.  
  
"Mate, lighten up!" the drunk, yet jovial pirate exclaimed. "Eat, drink, be merry...and DRINK!"  
  
"I know," Matt grumbled, "but did Mr. Turner have to bring those...I don't know what to the lodge." He motioned to the Teletubbies, who were babbling gibberish, as usual.  
  
"Ah. I was wondering about those. What in the bloody 'ell are they?"  
  
"Beats the shit out of me," And with that, Matt continued to watch the movie.  
  
Meanwhile, Indy and Henry were in a two-out-of-three game of chess. Don't ask why. Anyway, Henry yelled, "Checkmate!" as Indy groaned in defeat.  
  
"Three-out-of-five," Indy insisted.  
  
"No, Junior. You've been humiliated enough in front of kidsh and piratesh. Don't want you to go shuicshidal."  
  
"We're here," Will said as they reached the mansion. When they got into the two-story building, no word could simply describe it. It was amazing. Anway, the men carried the luggage up to the Bedrooms. Will and Eilzabeth, Jack and Barbossa, Gov. Swann and Norrington, Indy and Henry, Matt and Dana all had their own bedroom with those pairs. The Teletubbies were forced by Capt. Jack to sleep on the couch. Anyway, there were three hours of time to waste before dinner, so Indy and Henry played more chess. Matt and Dana made out like hell. Jack got roaring drunk. Will and Elizabeth cuddled up. Norrington, Barbossa, and Gov. Swann watched ESPN. The Teletubbies acted like douchebags. Tinky Winky looked for some of Elizabeth's corsets, and the rest played catch. The ball once hit Po in the stomach and knocked it on its ass. It cried, because the Tubbies can feel pain. Matt saw this, and did what he would normally do. He laughed his ass off, receiving stares from Elizabeth.  
  
"He's sadistic," Dana explained to Elizabeth. "It all started with admiring Steve Martin's character in Little Shop of Horrors and it grew to this."  
  
"And it doesn't bother you?" Elizabeth inquired.  
  
"Not anymore."  
  
When dinner was ready, 5/7 of the group had steak, while the Teletubbies had tubby toast. For the remainder of the day, the Tubbies kept bothering anyone they could find. Jack contemplated using his gun, but Will said to use the one bullet on Barbossa. Elizabeth thought about suffocating Tinky Winky with her corset, but was prevented by the Governor. Eventually, everyone went to bed.  
  
In his room, Gov. Swann wondered if Elizabeth should have invited all these people, especially those "things" that spouted nonsense and made the teenage boy laugh maniacally. Well, he thought, we'll be here for 4 weeks. Might as well try to get along. And with that, he fell asleep.  
  
However, things were amiss. And lives would never be the same again.  
  
Okay, now review and try to predict the killer. Remember, it ain't the Teletubbies and it is the least likely suspect. And that Matt is a sadist. 


	2. Shaken, Not Stirred

The Pirates of the Caribbean Murder Mystery  
  
Henry Jones entered the library before daybreak, hoping to find a book on Camelot. Eventually, he found it. As he headed towards the table, he found a wine glass filled with vodka martini. Henry sat there, and after reading a few pages, took a sip. Suddenly, he gasped and clutched his chest.  
  
Then, his world turned to darkness...  
  
In their bedroom, Matt and Kelly awoke to the gasp.  
  
"What the fuck was that?" Matt asked.  
  
"I think it came from the library," Kelly said. "Let's go."  
  
They walked towards the library. When they opened the door, they found Henry's body on the floor, the glass still in his hands. His eyes were wide open, yet he didn't breathe. Matt checked Henry's pulse, and found the man was dead.  
  
"Great Scott," Matt said. "We better find Indy."  
  
The lovebirds awoke the guests, except for the Teletubbies, because no one gave a shit about them. When they all got there, they were stunned at Henry's untimely demise. Indy, obviously, was heartbroken. Capt. Jack thought the drink Henry had was poisoned, but Norrington argued it was from natural causes. To find out, they had a doormouse sip some of the alcohol. Within seconds, the mouse dropped dead.  
  
"Hey," Will said. "There's a note."  
  
"What does it say, honey?" Elizabeth wondered.  
  
  
  
"'Henry's just the first. You will all suffer a fate worse than death.'" Will quoted.  
  
"I knew it!" Jack exclaimed proudly. "In your face, Commodore!"  
  
"Oh piss off, pirate." Norrington calmed shot back.  
  
"Fuck you!"  
  
  
  
"Well, fuck you too!"  
  
"Will you both shut up?!" Matt yelled. "Christ, you're acting like the Teletubby thingies."  
  
"You mean THOSE eunuchs?" Jack asked.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Eew!" Jack and Norrington said.  
  
"Well," the Governor said grimly. "Best be waiting for our demise."  
  
Later, the mood of the house was grim. Eyes shifted everyone, trying to spot the killer. This silence lasted for an hour. Then, Indy said, "Guys, come on. Just because my dad died doesn't mean we have to act like monks. Let's have a good time. I mean, Dad would want us to do that."  
  
Capt. Jack spoke up. "He's right. We can't let this unfortunate incident ruin our days here. Break out the rum, I say! Savvy?"  
  
A few more seconds of awkward silence passed, then the other relucantly agreed, so the mood soon changed to that of yesterday. Will and Elizabeth made out. Matt ridiculed Tinky Winky for sheer sadism. Jack got roaring drunk with Barbossa. Basically, life was back to normal.  
  
  
  
But not for long...  
  
Review, and remember to guess. 


	3. A Dead teletubby? I LOVE DEAD TELETUBBIE...

The Pirates of the Caribbean Murder Mystery  
  
Well, let me just say, Liza and Chica, good guesses. I won't say if you're right, but I see your logic. The suspect is the least likely person (although Matt is a sadist, so he isn't the murderer). Today's death is gorier than Henry's, and is based from a murder in the original PPG Murder Mystery.  
  
It was 5 in the morning. The group woke up early to see if they could go skiing. Unfortunately, they were snowed in, so they watched Secret Window on TV. Don't ask me how; maybe this is set after Secret Window was released on DVD.  
  
Anyway, Lala ran around, bugging everyone. He decided to go into Elizabeth's room, to see if Tinky Winky was trying to find a corset. When it reached there, no one was in. So, it was about to turn and leave, when it felt something lifting him by the neck. Because it was a bisexual dimwit, most likely, it said what it could only say at times like these.  
  
"Eh-oh!"  
  
The others heard Lala's cry.  
  
"What the bloody 'ell is it doing?" Jack pondered.  
  
"Who gives a crap?" Matt responded.  
  
The rest agreed, seeing how only BBC executives and little babies adored the Tubbies. So, they went on with whatever the hell they were doing. Indy taught Jack how to play chess, and Jack, oddly enough, beat him. Matt and Dana and Elizabeth and Will made out like sea otters. The other men watched more Johnny Depp films. The Teletubbies still acted like dipshits, and Matt humiliated Dipsy today. Elizabeth found Tinky Winky wearing one of her corsets, and nearly chopped it in half with Jack's sword. Matt and Dana agreed, that with that stunt, Tinky Winky was gay. The group had lasagne for dinner.  
  
The whole group was in the middle of Ed Wood, when all of a sudden. Will yelled uncharacteristically, "WHERE THE FUCK IS LALA?!"  
  
The others looked at him like he was a deranged psycho and/or Matt. Finally, Dana says, "And we give a shit how?"  
  
So they finished up Ed Wood, and went to the bedrooms. When Indy reached his room, he found a nasty and/or pleasant surprise.  
  
It seemed that Lala was hung by the serial killer. And given the fact he was a fat bastard, his head was severed from his body. Blood was all over the floor.  
  
Indy only said one word. "Yech!"  
  
Jack came in at Indy's disgusted cry. "Mate, why did you-HOLY SHIT!" Jack also saw Lala's carcass, and called the others. Elizabeth was sickened by the sight and vomited. The rest, however, were content.  
  
"Well," Dana said, "at least it was a Teletubby."  
  
"And there's another note," Norrington said. "'The Teletubbies are gay retards. So, as a reward, I taking a sick day of sorts.'"  
  
"HALLELUJAH!" the Governor exclaimed in elation. The reactions were quite similar.  
  
"But," Will said. "There are only three Tubbies left, so after they're gone, the killer will be after us."  
  
Jack and Indy panicked. They rushed to find the cell phones entrusted to them. Unfortunately, they lost them, which angered Dana.  
  
"YOU LOST THE FUCKING CELL PHONES?!" she yelled.  
  
Jack and Indy did what any normal person did.  
  
"WE ARE WORMS! WORTHLESS, DRUNKEN WORMS!!!" They wailed as they groveled before Dana. Matt and Norrington laughed their asses off, seeing Jack crying like a whelp.  
  
Anyway, the group decided to have a celebration. They celebrated like it was Times Square on New Years' Eve, and Matt was extra sadistic to the Teletubbies.  
  
And everyone went to sleep, happy and content.  
  
Remember to review. And just because the murderer is not gonna kill tomorrow doesn't meant there'll be no death... 


	4. The Creepiest and Most Violent Murder in...

The Pirates of the Caribbean Murder Mystery  
  
The next morning, there was 28 inches of snow and it was -14 degrees Fahrenheit. Matt sighed.  
  
"Another day stuck with drunk pirates and queer creatures," he remarked.  
  
The others moped around. Then, Barbossa spoke up.  
  
"All right. Why the hell did we bother coming here? I mean, the bloody author could've written us into a PoTC parody?!"  
  
"Because there are enough in the PoTC section already," Jack replied.  
  
"Oh fuck off, Sparrow!"  
  
"No, you fuck off!"  
  
"WILL YOU BOTH SHUT THE HELL UP?!" Indy yelled. "Now why should we spend our last days waiting to be killed off one-by-one?"  
  
"He's right," Dana said. "Let's at least make our final days a hell of a time."  
  
"The sadist's bitch is right!" Jack yelled. "W eshould celebrate; like it's a wedding! I LOVE WEDDINGS! DRINKS ALL AROUND!!!"  
  
"Bloody catchphrase," Norrington muttered.  
  
The group decided to watch some Tim Burton films, and started with Pee-Wee's Big Adventure. The Teletubbies went around, wearing corsets and being faggots. After Batman Returns, Burton films got tedious.   
  
"DOES ANYONE HAVE A GAMECUBE OR SOMETHING?!" Matt asked in fury.  
  
There was utter silence.  
  
"You mean this?" Will asked as he lifted a Gamecube.  
  
"MINE!" Matt dove right for it.  
  
"Gamecube craving. Like how Jack craves for rum," Dana explained.  
  
"Damn straight, luv," Jack responded.  
  
After a nice lunch from Domino's, everyone was bored again.  
  
"I'm bored," the Governor said.  
  
"No shit, Sherlock," Indy responded.  
  
A few minutes of silence past. Then Matt said, "You know what?"  
  
"What?" Jack said, to humor the teenage sadist. "The President is making sadism legal again.  
  
"It's always been legal," Matt said smugly. "Anyway, I feel EXTRA SADISTIC!"  
  
"And that means we have to fear you more?" Barbossa asked.  
  
"No. Only the purple faggot." And with that, Matt got out the Little Shop of Horrors soundtrack, put on the song "Dentist!", and got out dental tools. The group looked at Matt with incredulity and wonder, while Dana was helping him set up.  
  
"Commodore!" Matt ordered. "Get the purple faggot!"  
  
Norrington reluctantly brought Tinky Winky to Matt. Dana placed, or rather threw Tinky Winky into the chair.  
  
"Nurse," Matt said to Dana. "Get the drill."  
  
Dana brought him the drill Steve Martin almost used on Seymour in the movie.  
  
"That's not the current model," Indy observed.  
  
"Dr. Jones," Matt explained. "It's an antique. Dull and sturdy." Having said that, Matt began drilling. Tinky Winky, having never been to a dentist, giggled in glee, which pissed off Matt to no end.  
  
"That's your extra sadism?" Elizabeth asked.  
  
"Not yet," Matt replied with a slightly evil tone. "Nurse, get the Novocaine!"  
  
As Dana went to get the Novocaine, Jack asked, "I thought you used Novocaine BEFORE you started to drill."  
  
"Beats the shit out of me," Matt replied. "I ain't really a dentist."   
  
Dana returned with the Novocaine. "I got the overdose, hun."  
  
"Ooh," Matt yelled in malevolent glee. "OVERDOSE!" He got the needle, and turned to Tinky Winky. "Say Aaah," he said in a sweet tone.  
  
Tinky Winky said, "Eh-oh," in glee, expecting a present.  
  
  
  
"Now SCREAM!!!" Matt yelled in a hellish tone, and stuck the needle through the mouth and the back of the head. Tinky Winky and Elizabeth screamed in utter horror, while Matt maniacally laughed. The others stared in disbelief as the sadistic would-be dentist severed Tinky Winky's uvula and knocked out three teeth. By now, Tinky Winky was wailing, but that didn't stop Matt.  
  
"I'm gonna need a bigger needle," Matt said, and got out the Bride's sword from Kill Bill, and stabbed the purple Tubby in both eyes. Will fainted at this sight, and Elizabeth was utterly hysterical. Matt then cut a little blood mustache above Tinky's upper lip. Then, the sadist got out a chainsaw and cut open the Tubby's stomach. By now, Tinky Winky was near death. Matt reached in and ripped out Tinky's heart. Everyone in the room except Dana screamed, and Elizabeth fainted.  
  
Now, Matt got out a sledgehammer and CRUSHED Tinky's lungs and liver. Finally, Matt used the chainsaw to decapitate Tinky Winky, and its head fell onto the floor. And to finish the job, Matt took the Bride's sword, and stabbed Tinky in the left eye. The sadist cackled in sadistic glee as he waved the sword like a trophy. Dana then through Tinky's body out to rot in the snow, then removed the head and threw that in the trash can.  
  
By now, the Governor and Norrington had fainted, Indy looked at Matt and Dana like they were BOTH escaped psychos, and Jack laughed like a hyena at the incident. The two remaining Tubbies finally realized Tinky Winky was dead, and sobbed endlessly, which Matt and Jack laughed at.  
  
"MURDERERS!" Will yelled after he woke up. "YOU'RE THE MURDERERS!!!"  
  
"Honestly, Mr. Turner," Norrington said. "If they WERE the Murderers, he would have killed the faggot in private."  
  
"Oh," Will said.  
  
"Well," Dana said. "You want to kill the other things?"  
  
"Nah," Matt said. "That be a waste of my time."  
  
The group silently had chicken for dinner. They were still flabbergasted by the murder. They decided to play some Clue (How ironic...) Then, they went to bed, creeped out to no end, but relieved Matt didn't kill one of them.  
  
But one of THEM would be killed...  
  
The usual, review. Hope the death today kinda creeped you out. That's what I wanted to do. Scare some people with the content. 


	5. Forget Pop Rocks! WHEAT THINS Will Be th...

The Pirates of the Caribbean Murder Mystery  
  
Elizabeth walked into the kitchen at 2 in the morning. She hadn't eaten much dinner, and was hungry. She opened the cabinet to get some Wheat Thins. Suddenly, she felt a blow to her head and was out like a light.  
  
Oh, and the Wheat Thins tasted good.  
  
  
  
At 8 in the morning, Jack and Barbossa went into the kitchen to get some breakfast. Reluctantly, the rivals joined forces to protect each other from the killer. Anyway, they both decided to heat up some waffles. Jack opened the freezer...and was crushed by a large block of ice.  
  
"I didn't deserve that, mate," Jack muttered from under the ice.  
  
"Hold on," Barbossa said. "It's Elizabeth!"  
  
Indeed, Elizabeth was folded into half and frozen in a block of ice. Jack immediately went to get the others. Will and the Governor were wrecks.  
  
"WWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!" Will yelled to the sky. "WHY HER?! WHY NOT NORRINGTON?!"  
  
"Hey!" Norrington yelled in anger.  
  
"Shoot me, Jack! SHOOT ME!"  
  
Jack slapped Will and said to "snap out of it."  
  
Matt said nonchalantly, "Well, the killer appeased the Will fangirls."  
  
Meanwhile, at the I Love Will Turner fan club, the president had received a message from her psychic that Elizabitch-I mean, Elizabeth was dead. She told all 35,269,014 members, and they all celebrated and had rum and chocolate pudding.  
  
Back at the mansion, the Tubbies came in and humped the block of ice. Governor Swann and Will BEGGED Jack to shoot the Tubbies, but Jack said he was gonna use it on Barbossa.  
  
"But," Norrington said. "I thought you used that last bullet in the film."  
  
There was an awkward silence. Then Indy said, "Waffles anyone?"  
  
Later, Will thawed Elizabeth out and made love to her corpse. Gov. Swann reluctantly gave her corsets to the Teletubbies, who began to have wild sex on her bed. Matt and Kelly tried to attempt to perform "dental surgery" on Po, but Norrington said for their own good not to. The rest watched Game Show Network, while the newly-corseted Teletubbies went to search for dino shit. The group had some Rice-a-Roni for dinner. Before bed, the PoTC characters had a meeting.  
  
"Now," Norrington said. "It's taken three victims, but one of OUR people have finally been killed. Now, we must deduce who the killer is from clues. First off, the Teletubbies are not the killers because they are fucking retards."  
  
"Damn straight, Commodore," Jack said.  
  
  
  
"Shut up, pirate. Now, Henry Jones and Elizabeth are not the killers because they are dead. Apparently, neither Will nor the Governor would kill Elizabeth, Matt nor Dana are the killers because if they were, they'd have killed the purple Tubby in privacy. Nor I, because, well, I am a high-ranking officer."  
  
"But how do we know you're just saying that to throw the blame off yourself?" Barbossa asked.  
  
"Because I am a Commodore," Norrington explained, "not a lowly Captain. And Indiana would never kill his father. So, the only two possible culprits are Capt. Sparrow and Barbossa."  
  
  
  
"We resent that!" the captains both yelled.  
  
"But how do we know you both are trying to throw the blame off yourselves?" Norrington smugly asked.  
  
Jack paused, then said, "Go fuck off."  
  
So they al went to bed, hoping neither Jack nor Barbossa would not kill them.  
  
But will either pirate kill the next victim.  
  
  
  
Now, just 'cause Norrington says that Jack or Barbossa is the killer doesn't mean they are. So, the remaining lodgers are: Jack, Will, Gov, Swann, Norrington, Barbossa, Indy, Matt, Dana, Dipsy, and Po. Who will go next, and whodunit? 


	6. Why Did TipToeing Betray Me!

The Pirates of the Caribbean Murder Mystery  
  
Indiana Jones was walking down the hall at 1 in the morning. Basically, he had to take a shit, and because of the murders, he decided to tip-toe to the bathroom. Unfortunately, he forgot to notice the sawblade coming down on him.  
  
Or the thing I said in the first chapter about being killed in the hall.  
  
Norrington was sleeping about hot sex with Elizabeth, when he heard a sound. A sound like a guillotine. He hurriedly woke the Governor and went out to the hall. They found Indy, split in half, and blood was on the wall and the floor. They then awoke the others.  
  
Matt sighed, "Another dipshit who knew murders took place between midnight and 7."  
  
Jack said, "And another note. 'Why the hell was Indy even in this damn story?'"  
  
There was an awkward silence as everyone pondered the question.  
  
Later, Matt was trying to poison Po with Jack's kohl, but Jack threatened to slice him in two if he stole the kohl. Dana was busy doing yoga. Will was making love to Elizabeth's corpse, again. The rest of the guys were watching an anti-Teletubby show produced by DHSer89, author of the PPG Mystery, before his death, and featuring an appearence by Johnny Depp.  
  
"Now were have I seen that face before?" Jack wondered.  
  
  
  
And so, life went back to normal. TV, love, and attempted Teletubby death.  
  
But another person had to go.  
  
The usual drill, folks. Review, guess, and all that jazz. 


	7. DOUBLE WHAMMY! And I ain't talking Press...

The Pirates of the Caribbean Murder Mystery  
  
Will was busy making love to Elizabeth's corpse, again. Gov. Swann, who lay in Elizabeth's old bed, disgusted. "Mr. Turner," the Governor said, "can you at least take a break from your lovemaking session. Besides, she's dead."  
  
"Sure," Will said. And with that, they both went to sleep for the night.   
  
But never to wake up again...  
  
  
  
At 8 in the morning, the others had some waffles for breakfast. Jack wanted his usual breakfast from Tortuga; rum, rum, and tapioca pudding. But Matt said, "we must all have waffles, forthwith." So both remaining Teletubbies had waffles instead of tubby toast, so they threw a tantrum. By the end, the waffles were covered in tubby shit and stuck in the fan, and the rest had a look that said, "I'm gonna kick the shit out of both motherfuckers."  
  
"Now, where's the whelp?" Jack asked.  
  
"I think he and the Governor," Barbossa said, then pretend to slit his throat.  
  
"Most likely," Norrington said. "Pirate?"  
  
Yes?" Jack and Barbossa said.  
  
"I mean Sparrow. You and the sadist check up on the Governor and Mr. Turner."  
  
So, reluctantly, Jack and Matt went to Will's room, but the door was locked.  
  
"Will," Jack said, "open up, you corpse-fucking eunuch."  
  
"Gov. Swann," Matt said. "We've got waffles."  
  
"No we don't."  
  
"Shut up."  
  
Jack broke the door down, and found Will and the Governor asleep. Jack shook Will and the Governor, but accidentaly touched their necks. He, "shockingly", found no pulse. "Well," Jack finally said, "the fangirls won't be too happy about this."  
  
Meanwhile, back at the I Love Will Turner fan club, the psychic said that Will was killed. So, the now-59,062,148 members got out the coconuts, formed an angry mob, and went to New Jersey.  
  
Back at the mansion, Matt was looking for and weapons, but found none. "Well," he concluded, "if it wasn't a weapon, then maybe..." he trailed off, as he and Jack came to the same conclusion. They both rushed down to the basement, where the utility room was. When they got there, they found the air conditioners were rigged to blow in Smilex gas, from the first Batman film.  
  
"No wonder they went out with a smile," Jack said.  
  
Upstairs, the Teletubbies yelled, "Eh-oh!" for the umpteenth time.  
  
"But why didn't the killer rig THEIR room with Smilex?" matt complained.  
  
When they went upstairs, they found Po trying to shove a model of Jack the Monkey up it's ass, which pissed Barbossa to no end. Later, the survivors watched that anti-Teletubby show again, which had violence that rivaled Kill Bill's. The Teletubbies were again wearing corsets.  
  
And again, life went on. Just like the murders...  
  
Need I say more? 


End file.
